Animals’ New Year’s Resolutions

As one year is coming to an end and a new one beginning, we tend to make ourselves some promises - the so-called New Year’s resolutions. They usually involve a change in our behaviours needed to achieve a particular goal or generally improve our lives. People plan to eat less and / or consumer healthier food, stop smoking, exercise more frequently, read more books, spend more time with family, acquire additional education, find better jobs… Though we’re pretty sure this is exclusively human trait, let’s have a bit of fun trying to imagine the kind of New Year’s resolutions animals would make.

Control my anger

“What can I do, when someone makes me angry, I see red!!! This trait of mine is the reason I’m often called heavily aggressive and unpredictable, which keeps away not only enemies but friends as well. I’ve heard there are anger management techniques and plan to start applying them as of January 2018 – promise! Let’s see what that will do for my reputation.”

Don’t laugh at misfortune of others

“What can I say, this funny hysterical laughter is in my nature and I didn’t even think it could be hurting someone else’s feelings.

But I’m not an insensitive creature my savannah neighbours make me out to be, and intend to prove it in 2018: no more laughing at my fellow animals in trouble!”

Slow Down and spend more time with family and friends

“I’m watching our guys hang out together and thinking that perhaps it’s not such a bad idea. Ladies of my species may not be the most sociable animals around, but it could be nice to get together occasionally and exchange gossip, take a few fast and clever besties on a hunt for oryxes and the nyalas, and watch each other’s back from praying devils like lions, leopards and spotted hyenas. So let’s make that my New Year’s resolution for 2018: do more things with friends and family members.”

Be more supportive

My job is to protect my pride and I can do it better than anybody. However, it has been brought to my attention that my behaviour as a partner and a dad shows some room for improvement, primarily because I’m not around while cubs are blind and pretty much helpless. I can’t lie, their mum is investing all her resources to keep them from harm and could probably use a helping hand from a strong and capable male.  So I’ll surprise her next year by offering babysitting services every once in a while.

Let it go once in a while

People are so impressed with our memory that they even coined the phrase “elephants never forget”. While this is 100% true and comes in very handy more often than not, imagine if you had to remember all the bad things that have happened throughout your life. Let me tell you, I may have made up with my former best friend years ago, if only there was a way to forget she had once occupied my favourite mud bath. Well, I’m not going to be one to hold a grudge for 50 years or more, so in 2018 I’ll work on letting things go.